Back                       Blueprint                      Next


    LATEST EXHIBITS, deeds, and chores:


    (not including endless work on Froissart and fixing
    stuff and learning more tech stuff and typing.




January 20, 2007.  Chapter 13, Chapter 14,  Chapter 15 and the Preface of The History
of Chivalry
, by G. P. R. James are online.  Just the notes, 2 pics and the proofreading to
go and its done!

From the Glossary in
Yorkshire Wit, Character, Folklore & Customs, by R. Blakeborough,
(1911), p. 347:

    Buzznacking, part.  Gossiping.


From Monologues and Parodies, compiled by J. F. Hartman (A Comedian), 1910, p. 46:


    There was a small boy of Quebec,
    Who was buried in snow to his neck;
            When they said, "Are you friz?"
            He replied, "Yes I is --
    But we don't call this cold in Quebec!"

    --Rudyard Kipling.


January 17, 2007.  Chapters 8-12 of The History of Chivalry, by G. P. R. James are online.
(barely proofed)

Also online from
Old Church Lore by William Andrews (barely proofed):

The Biddenden Maids Charity,
Plagues and Pestilences,
The Services and Customs of Royal Oak Day


Two Old Oxford Jokes, from The Cyclopaedia of Wit and Humor, edited by William E.
Burton, 1881,  p. 769:


        A gentleman entered the room of Dr. Barton, Wardon of Merton
    College, and told him that Dr. Vowel was dead.  "What!" said he, "Dr.
    Vowel dead!  thank heaven it was neither U nor I."

    ________


        Wetheral, the Master of University College, went to Dr. Lee, then
    sick in bed, and said -- "So, Dr. Everleigh has been egged on to
    matrimony."  "Has he?" said he; "why, then, I hope the yoke will sit
    easy."


From Grose's --A Provincial Glossary, of 1811, an 'Exmore' word defined:


    Zowerswopped -- ill-natured.



January 16, 2007.

From the Glossary in
Yorkshire Wit, Character, Folklore & Customs, by R. Blakeborough,
(1911), p. 330:

    Afterwit, Eftherwit, n.  An idea which strikes one often when too      
                                        late to remedy a mistake.


January 7, 2007.  Chapter 7, of The History of chivalry, by G. P. R. James is online.


Also online, by Washington Irving, some excerpts from Knickerbocker's History of
New York, and The Legend of Sleepy Hollow (with less typos than the other online
versions)


All of Volume I, 500 plus pages (~ 330 chapters) of
Froissart, partially proofed is online!




January 6, 2007.
 Chapter 6, of the History of Chivalry, By G. P. R. James is online.

Also Online:
The Horse-Swap and Georgia Theatrics, by Augustus Baldwin Longstreet,
My First Visit to Portland, by Seba Smith.



From The New Pun Book, p. 113:


DICK -- "Do you think you'll have much trouble in popping the question?"
TOM -- "No, I think I'll have more trouble in questioning the pop."

    _____


    What do you think of Windig?
    He reminds  me of a river.
    What's the answer?
    The biggest part of him is his mouth.


January 5, 2007.  Chapter 5 of the History of Chivalry, by G. P. R. James is online.


20 more chapters of Froissart are up.

The Mosquito, by William Cullen Bryant is online and a very funny poem.

The Battle of the Kegs from the 1700's, by Francis Hopkinson, and 2 poems by Fitz-
Greene Halleck, A Fragment, and Domestic Happiness are also online.

From
The New Pun Book (1906), p. 130:


         Lawyer:  "Have you conscientious scruples against serving as a
    juror where the penalty is death?"
        Boston Talesman: "I have."
        Lawyer: "What is your objection?"
        Boston Talesman: "I do not desire to die."

    _____


        Cohen left the ball-game because he said the umpire looked right
    at him when he called "three balls!"



January 4, 2007.  Happy New Year!

The text of La Vita Nuova, The New Life by Dante Alighieri, translated by Charles Eliot
Norton is online.  (Notes and essays pending.)  This is the best work by Dante, in
translation, I have ever read and almost makes me understand what the fuss is all about.

Online, some excerpts by
Alfonso X, King of Leon and Castile, from the 13th century, On
the Definition of a Tyrant, How the Turks Got Their Name, and a poem to the Month of
Mary (May).  The translator is not credited.

Also online, Some excerpts by
Alfred the Great, the Anglo-Saxon King of England in the
9th century: On Kingcraft, another translation of his letter to Waerferth, on re-
establishing learning in England, and a poem from "A Sorrowful Fytte."  Again, the name
of the translator is not noted.  For comparison, the first translation we put up of the
same letter, is
here.

Some extracts of his Adventures by
Antar are online, a famous Arab classical epic poet of
the 7th century translated by Terrick Hamilton.

20 more chapters of
Froissart are online, Chapters 240-259.

Chapter 4, The History of Chivalry by G. P. R. James is online and unproofed.

The Chapters:
Amesbury Monastery, Cranbourn Chase: King John's Hunting-seat,
Devizes Castle, Littlecote House -- A Mysterious Story, Draycot House: The Legend of
the White Hand, from John Timbs, The Castles, Abbeys and Great Halls of England and
Wales
are online.

And online, the rest of Volume 1 of
Fabliaux or Tales, abridged from French Manuscripts
of the XIIth and XIIIth Centuries by M. Le Grand, selected and translated into English
Verse, by the Late G. I., Way, Esq., with A Preface, Notes, and Appendix, by the late G.
Ellis, Esq.  The text and the
Preface and notes by Ellis are complete.  Proofreading and
the pictures are pending.

The stories are:
Aucassin and Nicolette (a verse translation by G. I. Way),
The Lay of the Little Bird,
The Priest Who Had a Mother in Spite of Himself,
The Canonesses and the Gray Nuns,
The Order of Knighthood,
The Gentle Bachelor,
The Mantle Made Amiss,
The Mule Without a Bridle.




December 31, 2006.  Online,
The Mule Without a Bridle, by Paysans de Maisieres, from
Fabliaux or Tales, abridged from French Manuscripts of the XIIth and XIIIth Centuries
by M. Le Grand, selected and translated into English Verse, by the Late G. I., Way, Esq.,
with A Preface, Notes, and Appendix, by the late G. Ellis, Esq., Volume I.  (Unproofed)


December 27, 2006.
 Longleat and Lacock Abbey, by John Timbs, from Abbeys, Castles
and Ancient Halls of England and Wales
; Their Legendary Lord and Popular History,
Volume 2, is online. (Only partially proofed-- just spell-checked.)


December 25, 2006
.  Merry Christmas!

Online now is a great little book for you,  The Rise of Universities by Charles Homer
Haskins, which is made up of three lectures: I.  The Earliest Universities; II.  The
Mediaeval Professor;  III.  The Mediaeval Student.  It is partially proofed.


Also online, a funny poem by
Oliver Wendell Holmes:  The Height of the Ridiculous.


The Muse's Comforting by Pierre de Ronsard is now on the bottom of The Court of the
Muses page (translated by Curtis Hidden Page).


From The New Pun Book, p. 83:


    Some people who jump at conclusions lose sight of the hurdles.


and from p. 75:


        After a man has had occasion to employ a first-class lawyer it is
    useless to tell him that talk is cheap.


and from p. 66:


        "A butcher knows how to make both ends meet."
        "Yes, if you give him the proper steer."




December 24, 2006.    New Elfinspell Slogan (Magnet, Bumper-Sticker, Note-pads &T-
shirt pending):


    All I want for Christmas is a Frontal Lobotomy!


    Copyright © 2006 Elfinspell



December 23, 2006.  Quotes for today, by F. W. Bain, in 1914:

        "Pundits, as a rule, end where they began, 'lost in the gloom of
    uninspired research.'"

and also by Bain:

        "Jealousy, be it noted, is a thing that many people much
    misunderstand.  Ask anyone the question, where in literature is
    jealousy best illustrated, and ninety-nine people in a hundred will
    reply, Othello.  But, as Pushkin excellently says, Othello is not
    naturally a jealous man at all: he is his exact antipodes, a confiding,
    unsuspicious nature.  **. . .

    "**  This "detached reflection" of Russia's national poet is endorsed
    by Dostoyeffsky, the greatest master of jealousy that the world has
    ever seen. "  


My Christmas Present to Everybody:  The most enlightening
website on the Internet, if your goal is to understand much of how
society functions both for the better and the worst.  Knowledge
might lead to hope and change -- and then a higher percentage of
humor, health, happiness and peace may result for all.    At least
that is my own hope and wish.  Seek wisdom from Tim Field here:



The News Flash is this: Unless there is an active plan for stopping
bullying in the workplace by adults, then there will be little use in
combating bullying in schools.  By teaching children to object to
bullying, violence and prejudice and then sending them into
adulthood which is rife with bullies and intolerance and violence,
we are guaranteeing their failure to succeed with this belief and
marking them as future BullyBait.  

Don't do it.  Learn.   

Stopping bullies starts with you, but you have to be able to
recognize them first.   If you don't learn, how can you know if you
are BullyBait or an accidental bully (out of ignorance) or not?  Or
teaching one to be a bully [or BullyBait]?  Or raising a bully [or
BullyBait]?



From The New Pun Book, 1917,  p. 135:

         The other day the head of a boarding-school noticed one of the
    boys wiping his knife on the table-cloth, and pounced on him at once.
        "Is that what you do at home?" he asked indignantly.
        "Oh, no," answered the boy quickly, "we have clean knives."



December 18, 2006.  200 or so pages  Froissart have been re-formatted, and re-foot-
noted for browser compatibility over the last one month, making 384 pages (the first
245 Chapters) done.  The last half need finally proofreading and the pictures.   Plus I
found I had skipped an entire chapter! (which is now online)

Funny as all get out, is "The Hospital for Liars," by an anonymous person, from The
New York Times
in the 19th century.  Isn't it amazing that newspapers could do this at
one time and make a living?

One of the only things better than humor is Homer, The Blind Bard, and the
people who admire him and have helped to preserve his works.   Homer was lost to
Europe and regretted for many centuries.  One man's incredible joy at discovering him is
here, in
To His Valet, by Pierre de Ronsard.  As a reminder of the immense importance of
Homer, a poet, this very famous Renaissance poet could not have said it better himself
here in
The Power of Song, by Pierre de Ronsard,  both are translated by Curtis Hidden
Page.  (I wonder if that is his real name?)

Reading Homer, even in translation proved inspiration enough to John
Keats, On Looking Into Chapman's Homer.

Though he is another huge fan of Homer, I reluctantly put up an example
of shameful academic intolerance and blighting of the spread of
knowledge and crushing of creativity, --  a lecture by
Matthew Arnold : Homer
and his Translators.   The same sort of view in verse is up by Lord Alfred Tennyson, On
Translations of Homer.  

In contrast, more laudable views that display tolerance, (which is essential to true
wisdom and the expansion of creativity),  are given by Butcher and Lang, On
Translations of Homer.

Also online, a little bit of esoterica re: Homerica,
a Letter by Alexander Pope, asking the
Earl of Halifax not to 'Lose Homer.'  

However one learns to love a beautiful poet or an author, in translation or in their native
language, is generally good.

From the 19th century
Vanity Fair:


    "Old dog Tray's ever faithful," they say,
    But the dog who is faithful can never be-Tray.




December 13, 2005.  Online, The Revenge of St. Nicholas, A Tale for the Holidays, by
James K. Paulding, an 19th century author.

Frederick Cozzens, A Christmas Piece is far better, and certainly more joyful.

Also, just in time for the holidays, A New and Necessary Service:  
Who Says You Can't
Buy a Guardian Angel?

From The New Pun Book, p. 135:


         JOHN -- Say, do you want to get next to a scheme for making
    money fast?
        TOM --Sure I do.
        JOHN -- Glue it to the floor.


After the Sword Fell by Juno Wye, is online.





December 11, 2006.  Poems by
Lapo Gianni, a friend of Dante, and Folgore da San
Gimignano,  who is a little bitter about the perils of visiting the country, are online in both
Italian and English, translated by Lorna de' Lucchi.

More Juvenalia online,  
How Miss Squirrel Fluff Fluffed Her Tail by Alice Ross Colver.

Much better stuff, and funny, is also online,  
Infantile Scintillations by Robert J. Burdette.

More revamping of older pages done, with many a gnash of tusks.



December 9, 2006.  
The Divorce of Napoleon and Josephine, from Some Lies and Errors
of History, by Reuben Parsons is online.  


The Easter Sepulchres, and St. Paul's Cross from Old Church Lore, by William Andrews is
online.

For kids, of any age,
The Sunshine Bird, from The Wish Fairy of the Sunshine and
Shadow Forest, by Alice Ross Colver is online.

The High-Road to Fame, from "The Morals of Abou Ben Adhem,"  by David B. Locke
("Petroleum V. Nasby"), is a burning satire against bullies and sadists.  


Unfortunately, his objections to such beastly inhumane behavior remains in the
minority.  One look at "The World's Funniest Videos," Reality TV and the usual news
report will prove this most days.  It is so sad, terribly sad,  that the mentality, morality
and mercy of those who watched the bloody spectacles at the Roman Coliseum,  or at
the tribunals of the Inquisition still rule today and foster that mindset, propagating its
continued popularity with determination and malevolent intent.


Odette, A Fairy Tale for Weary People, by Ronald Firbank, necessarily follows the above,
so is online.

The Chapters:
Fonthill and Fonthill Abbey and Castles of Marlborough, Great Bedwin,
and Trowbridge from Abbeys, Castles and  Ancient Halls of England and Wales, by John
Timbs
is online.  


From
The New Pun Book, p. 138:


    He who courts and goes away,
        May court again another day;
    But he who weds and courts girls still
        May go to court against his will.

    _____


        A notice at a small depot near Manchester reads:
        "Passengers are requested to cross over the railway by the
    subway."
        This reminds us of the oft-quoted notice put up at the ford of an
    Irish river:
        "When this board is under water the river is unpassable."



December 6, 2006.  Chapter XII, From Homer to Herodotus, is online, from An
Introduction to the History of History
, by James T. Shotwell.


Il Novellino, The Hundred Old Tales, translated by Edward Storer, is proofed for the last
time.

From
The New Pun Book, p. 104:



    "Another tragedy," said the cynic, as shrill shrieks arose from the
    ruined cistern.  "I suppose there is a woman at the bottom of it."



December 3, 2006.  Chapter XI, Non-Biblical Literature; Josephus, is online, from An
Introduction to the History of History
, by James T. Shotwell.


The Infernal Marriage, by Benjamin Disraeli, Lord of Beaconsfield, is finally proofed.  
What a great spoof!


From
The New Pun Book, p. 130:


        "Paw, can an honest man play poker?"
        "Yes, Tommy; but he can't win anything."



December 2, 2006.  Chapter X, The Formation of the Canon is online, from An
Introduction to the History of History
, by James T. Shotwell.  It is partially proofed.


Poems by Guido Guinizelli, a sonnet and a canzone,  and poems by Guido Cavalcanti, a
canzone, a ballad and a sonnet, are online in both English and Italian, translated by
Lorna de' Lucchi.  Both of these early Italian poets were a major influence on Dante and
lived in the 13th century.

One more version of a
poem by Cecco Angiolieri is online that is quite funny.  Dante knew
this man, but obviously did not mimic him, since so far, I have found scant evidence that
Dante had any kind of a sense of humor!

Finally completely done (I hope!)
Old-World Love Stories from the Lays of Marie de
France & Other Mediæval Romances & Legends translated from the French by Eugene
Mason, Illustrated and Decorated by Reginald L. Knowles, 1913.

For Brandon, Evan and Houston, (none of whom lisp, it's because of the cat!), from
Humorous Hits and How to Hold an Audience, p. 202:


    LISP

      ANONYMOUS


    Thome folks thay I listhp,
    But then I don't perthieve it.
    Just listhen while I call the cat:
    "Here Pusthy !  Pusthy !  Pusthy !"
    Now thee I don't listhp.




    Go to the Archives for the chronological record of the
    additions for the past 2 years.