From Innominata — Stories and Episodes Omitted from Household Editions of Italian Classics, publisher and date unstated, circa 192-; pp. 23-29.

SEVEN TALES FROM THE DECAMERON
,
BY
GIOVANNI BOCCACCIO
(1313-1375)

Second Tale*
(Third Day, Novel I)

ARGUMENT

Masetto da Lamporecchio, pretending to be dumb, is taken in to be gardener to a convent of nuns: what happens in consequence..

THERE are many people, fair ladies, so simple as to imagine, that, after a young lady has put on the white veil, and the black hood, she ceases to have the feelings and passions of a woman, as if by becoming a nun she was converted into stone. If these people hear anything contrary to this opinion, they are as much offended as though some very heinous and unnatural crime was committed; never thinking of themselves, who cannot be satisfied, although they have the liberty of doing as they will; nor considering the prevalence of leisure and solitude. In like manner, there are others who think that the spade and pickax, with hard labor and gross feeding, quench all lustful appetites, depriving the people of all sense and understanding; but how much they are both mistaken, I shall, at the Queen’s command, now show you, keeping close to the subject which she has given us.

There was formerly in our neighborhood (and may be still) a convent of nuns, famous for their sanctity. In this convent (which shall be nameless, because I would not lessen the characters of its pious inmates), there were only eight young ladies, with an Abbess; there was also a gardener to look after their fine garden, who, not being satisfied with his salary, made up his accounts with their steward, and returned to Lamporecchio, when he came. Amongst many others who came to welcome him home, was a fine strapping young fellow named Masetto, who inquired of him where he had been all that time? The honest man (whose name was Nuto) told him. The other inquired again in what capacity he served the convent? ‘I had care of the garden,” he 24 replied, “and used to go to the wood for fagots; I drew water for them also, with such-like services; but my wages were so small they would scarcely find me shoes; and besides they are all so young and giddy, that I could do nothing to please them; for when I have been in the garden, one would cry to do this, and another do that, and another would take the spade out of my hand, and tell me ‘that thing is in a wrong place,’ and they have given me so much trouble altogether, that I have left them. The steward desired, at my departure, if I met with a proper person, to send him; but hang me if I do any such thing.”

When Masetto heard this, he had a great desire to get among those nuns, guessing from what Nuto had said, that he might be able to gain his ends. But lest his purpose should be defeated, if he let the other into the secret, he said to him, “you did very right to come away: what has a man to do among so many women? He might as well be with as many devils: for it is not once in ten times they know what they would be at.” After they had done talking together, Masetto began to contrive what method he should take to get introduced; and being assured that he could do all the work that Nuto had mentioned, he had no fears upon that account: all the danger seemed rather to be in his youth hand person; whether he might not be rejected. After much reflection, he reasoned with himself: “I live far enough off and nobody knows me: suppose I feign myself dumb, they will certainly receive me then.”

Resolved on this, without saying a word to any one about where he was going, he took an ax on his shoulder, and went like a poor man to the convent; and finding the steward in the courtyard, he made signs like a dumb person for a little bread, and that he would cleave wood if they had any occasion. The steward gave him something to eat, and afterward showed him divers 25 pieces of wood, which Nuto was not able to rend, but which Masetto, in a little time (being very strong), split all to pieces. The steward, having occasion to go to the wood, took him with him; where he made him fell several trees, load the ass with them, and drive it home before him: this Masetto did very well; and the steward wanting him for other things, he continued there for several days, till at length the Abbess saw him, and asked the steward what the man did there? “Madam,” he replied, “this is a poor man, deaf and dumb, who came the other day to ask charity, which I gave him, and he has done many things for us since. I believe, if he knows anything of gardening and could be prevailed upon to stay, that he might be of good service; for we want such a person, and he is strong, and will do what work we please: besides, there will be no fear of his seducing any of the young ladies.” — “Why, truly,” quoth the Abbess, “you say right; see if he knows how to work, and if so, try to keep him; make much of him, give him a pair of shoes, and an old coat, and let him have his fill of victuals.” This the steward promised to do. Masetto, who was at no great distance, but seemed busy in sweeping the court, heard all this, and said merrily to himself, “Yes, if you let me stay here, I’ll do your business as it never was done before.” The steward, who was aware that he knew how to work, now inquired of him by signs whether he was willing to stay: and Masetto having made signs that he was, the steward took him into the garden, show3ed him what he wished to have done, and left him there.

Now the nuns used to come every day to tease and laugh at the deaf and dumb gardener, and would say the naughtiest words in the world before him, imagining, that he did not hear them; whilst the Abbess took no notice of all this, thinking perhaps that as the man could not wag his tongue, he was equally harmless in other 26 respects. One day when he had lain down to rest himself, tow nuns, who were walking in the garden, came to the place where he pretended to be asleep: and as they stood looking at him, one, who was a little more forward than the other said, “Could I be assured of your secrecy, I would tell you of a thought I have often had in my head, which might be of service to yourself.” “You may speak safely,” said the other, “for I will never disclose it.” then said the firs nun: “We are kept here in strict confinement, and not a man suffered to come near us, but our steward, who is old, and this dumb man. Now I have many and many a time heard from ladies who have come to see us, that all the other delights in the world are nothing to what a woman enjoys in a man’s arms. I have often therefore had it in my mind to try the experiment with this dumb fellow, since no other is to be had; besides he is the fittest in the world for our purpose, being such an idiot, that he cannot expose us if he would; what is your opinion?” “Alas!” quoth the other, “what is that you say? Do not you now that we have promised our virginity to God?” “Oh! but sister,” she replied, “how many things do we promise very day, which we never perform? If we have promised, there will be others found that shall be more punctual.” — “But, if we should be with child, what would become of us then?” — “You think of the worst before it happens: it will be time enough to talk of that when it comes: there are a thousand ways of managing in such a case, that nobody will ever be the wiser unless we ourselves make the discovery.” — “Well, then,” said the second nun, who was even more curious than her friend to know what sort of an animal a man might be; “how shall we contrive this matter?” — “You see,” replied the other, “it is about midday, and I believe our sisters are all asleep; let us look round the garden, and if nobody be in it, what have we to do, but 27 for one of us to lead him into yonder arbor, whilst the other keeps watch. He is such a fool that we can do what we like with him.”

Masetto heard all this, and was quite ready to gratify the ladies, but waited until one f them should come and rouse him from his pretended sleep. The two nuns having assured themselves that nobody could see them, she who had been the first to move in the affair went and shook the gardener. He got up; the nun playfully took him by the hand, and led him, grinning and laughing like an idiot, to the arbor, where without giving her much trouble to explain her wishes he did what she wanted. Her curiosity having been satisfied, she made way for her companions, to whom Masetto, fool as he seemed, behaved equally well. Before they left him, each of them repeated the experiment once more, and they agreed in declaring that the result surpasses all that they could have imagined. After this it may easily be guessed how frequent were their visits to the arbor, and how punctually they availed themselves of the fitting hours to take their diversion with the good natured mute.

It chanced, however, one day that their proceedings were observed by one of the sisterhood, who immediately brought two other sisters to witness them. At first the trio were for informing the Lady Abbess, but afterward they changed their minds, entered into an arrangement with the detected pair, and became jointly interested with them in Masetto’s services. There now remained but three nuns who were not privy to the secret; but in course of time they too came in various ways to share in it with the rest.

Finally the Abbess, who as yet had no notion of these doings, was taking a walk all alone in the garden one very sultry day, and found Masetto stripped to his shirt and asleep on the broad of his back, under an almond 28 tree, having, it seems, not much to do that day, because he had been hard at work all the night before. Just then the wind fluttered the loose end of his single garment, and the Abbess saw what immediately gave her a fit of the complaint then prevalent in the convent. Waking up Masetto she took him to her chamber, where she kept him close for some days, to the great mortification of the nuns, who complained loudly that the gardener did not come to his daily labor. She let him go at last, but often had him back again, and altogether engrossed more than her fair share of his attendance. Masetto began to find it no easy task to please so many mistresses, and was strongly of the opinion that things would come to a bad pass with him if he continued dumb much longer. One night then, when he was with the Abbess, his tongue was suddenly untied, and said he, “I have often heard say, madam, that one cock can do very well for ten hens, but that ten men can hardly with their best endeavors satisfy one woman, whereas I have to serve nine. I can’t stand it any longer. I’m fairly worn out with what I have done already; so please either to let me go my way in God’s name, or put this matter to rights somehow.”

The Abbess was astounded to hear him speak. “Why, how is this?” she said, “I thought you were dumb.” — “So I was, madam, but not by nature. I had a long disorder which deprived me of my speech: and it was only this very night, thanks be to God, that I felt it come back to me.” The Abbess believed this tale, or feigned to do so, and asked him what he meant by saying that he had nine women to satisfy. Masetto explained the whole case to her; and she like a discreet abbess, instead of sending him away, resolved to come to an understanding with her nuns, and devise with them how they might keep such a good gardener without incurring any scandal. A full and unreserved explanation soon 29 took place between all parties, and the old steward happening to die very opportunely, Masetto was, with his own consent, unanimously chosen to fill the vacant place, and his duties were so apportioned that he could discharge them without inordinate fatigue. At the same time the people of the neighborhood were made to believe that through the prayers of the sisterhood, and through the merits of the saint to whom the convent was dedicated, the man who had been so long dumb had recovered his speech. Under the new steward’s management the convent became a little nursery for the propagation of the monastic order, but everything was so quietly done that there never was any talk about it until after the death of the Abbess, when Masetto, being now in years and wealthy, was desirous of returning home.

His desire was readily complied with: and thus, taking no care for his children, but bequeathing them to the place where they were bed and born, he returned a wealthy man to his native place, which he had quitted with nothing but an ax over his shoulder, having had the wit to employ the season of his youth to good purpose.

[Boccaccio took his story from the ‘Cento Novelle Antiche,” but substituted an abbess and her nuns for a countess and her camerarie He in his turn has been followed, with some slight modifications, by La Fontaine, in his ‘Mazet de Lamporechio.’]

ElfEd Notes

 *  This is the Americanized spelling of the Third Day, Novel I, from The Decameron, Or Ten Days Entertainment by Boccaccio: A Revised English Translation by W. K. Kelly, London: Henry G. Bohn, 1855; pp. 137-142. Most of the text is the modernized English translation by Edward du Bois, published in 1804, from the 18th century translation of 1741, by Charles Balguy, a physician, which was published anonymously as The Decameron, or Ten Days Entertainment of Boccacce. Translated from the Italian, London: R. Dodsley, 1741. Walter Keating Kelly inserted the omitted portions, whether words, phrases or sentences, that were felt to be too racy for the general public in the earlier, and later, translations. Thus, these stories are the unexpurgated versions, euphemistic as they may be. The first appearance of Boccaccio, in English, was the anonymous 17th translation (possibly by John Florio), entitled: The Modell of Wit, Mirth, Eloquence, and Conversation. Framed in Ten Dayes, of an hundred curious Pieces, by seven honourable ladies, and three noble gentlemen. Preserved to Posterity by the renowned John Boccacio, the first refiner of Italian prose: and now translated into English, London: Printed by Isaac Jaggard, 1625. — Elf.Ed.