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The Page of Putrid & Poisonous Practices (In Shades
of Pus, Mucous, Cerumen [ear wax], etc., and other
Hues Reminiscent of The Bilious Humours, or a Sinus
Infection.)

Subliminal Help Wanted Song:

A Lyrical Invitation to Join
Cingular alias AT & T alias Bell South
in Their
Relative Customer Care Department

[as suspected
by
Straydoc’s Own Experience]


 
[The fine art of Customer Torture,
This tasty story now to you I shall tell:]

“Come work for us, we’re all sadists,
Many a patsy pays to come to singular AT & T HELL!

II

Mock and scoff.



    “You see, it starts with our sales force.
     They’re on the phone at the very first ring.
     They shuffle and jive and promise
     The earth? The sky? Its all yours! they sing.

III.

Titter, Hee, Hee.


    Go on, Thrill and trill:

    Such a job! To Tease and Squeeze;
    To Squish, Squash and Splatter
    Ignoring all matter in our pre-sales patter.


    (The suckers? Very unwary & dumb di-dumb-dumb.)

IV

Chortle plus Chuckle.



V

Yum Yum Yum!!!




Repeat Our Mantra (ad nauseam):

To Tease and Squeeze;
To Squish, Squash and Splatter
Ignoring all matter in our pre-sales patter:


THAT’S OUR JOB!!!


... You rang?

Hah! Splat!
Take that, Fool!
  Yea, yea!




finale:


And I......

Just got one more sucker-so-dumb!)



(and this is just the
Beginning, there’s lots more
rollicking & frolicking to
come!)

18 million dollars???

What an execrable waste.
Copyright © 2007 StraydocSays




    “After holding just a wee while
     (If their credit card is good!)
     Charge them, it’s a sealed deal!
     Phone stuff arrives almost when it should.


    Now, Warble the chorus:

    Our job: To Tease and Squeeze;
    To Squish, Squash and Splatter
    Ignoring all matter in our pre-sales patter.

       (The suckers are dreadfully dumb-di-dumb.)

    Rap the Refrain:

    The job: To Tease and Squeeze;
    To Squish, Squash and Splatter
    Ignoring all matter in our pre-sales patter.

    (The suckers are all so dumb, dumb, dumb.)

I

Heh, Heh, Heh.



    “This is just the first taste of fun
     Here we can start to savor it.
     (What’s a day or three or five to us? )
     That whiff of their first whines, the tinge,
     O bliss! Inhale! O aroma! The very first singe!


    Shout it out!

    MY job: To Tease and Squeeze;
    To Squish, Squash and Splatter
    Ignoring all matter in our pre-sales patter.

       (Suckers are abysmally dismally dumb di dumb.)


    “This little tickle to your nostrils,
     A Fragrant, tantalizing lure,
     Is the Herald, the Appetizer,
     Of our Banquet of Bullies,  
     Do you love it?
   ............

     YES?.....YES?.....YES!

     Then You’re invited to apply! -- Please
     Come revel with us, at our feast!”