From The Wit and Humor of America, edited by Marshall P. Wilder, Volume IV, New York and London: Funk and Wagnalls and Company, 1911; pp. 647-649.
A CABLE-CAR PREACHER
BY SAM WALTER FOSS
I
“ ’Tis strange how thoughtless people are,”
A man said in a cable-car,
“How careless and how thoughtless,” said
”The Loud Man in the cable-car;
And then the Man with One Lame Leg
Said softly, “Pardon me, I beg,
For your valise is on my knee;
“It’s sore,” said he of One Lame Leg.
II
A woman then came in with twins
And stumbled o’er the Loud Man’s shins;
And she was tired half to death,
This Woman Who Came in with Twins;
And then the Man with One Lame Leg
Sai, “Madam, take my seat, I beg,”
She sat, with her vociferant Twins,
And thanked the man of One Lame Leg.
III
“’Tis strange how selfish people are,
They carry boorishness so far;
How selfish, careless, thoughtless,” said
The Loud Man of the cable-car.
A Man then with the Lung Complaint
Grew dizzy and began to faint;
He reeled and swayed from side to side,
This poor Man with the Lung Complaint.
IV
The Woman Who Came in with Twins
Said, “You can hardly keep your pins;
Pray, take my seat.” He sat, and thanked
The Woman Who Came in with Twins.
The Loud Man once again began
To curse the selfishness of man;
Our lack of manners he bewailed
With vigor, did this Loud, Loud Man.
V
But still the Loud Man kept his seat;
A Blind Man stumbled o’er his feet;
The Loud Man preached on selfishness,
And preached, and preached, and kept his seat.
The poor Man with the Lung Complaint
Stood up — a brave, heroic saint —
And to the Blind Man, “Take my seat,”
Said he who had the Lung Complaint.
VI
The Loud Man preached on selfish sins;
The Woman Who Came in with Twins;
The poor Man with the Lung Complaint,
Stood, while he preached on selfish sins.
And still the man with One Lame Leg
Stood there on his imperfect peg
And heard the screed on selfish sins —
This patient Man with One Lame Leg.
VII
The Loud Man of the cable-car
Sat still and preached and traveled far;
The Blind Man spake no word unto
The Loud Man of the cable-car.
The Lame-Legged Man looked reconciled,
And she with Twins her grief beguiled,
The poor Man with the Lung Complaint —
All stood, and sweetly, sadly smiled.